


Her

by 50251sid



Category: The Borgias, The Borgias (2011)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drunk Sex, Drunkenness, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Oral Sex, Sexual Fantasy, Sibling Incest, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-08-25
Packaged: 2018-02-11 23:09:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2086662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/50251sid/pseuds/50251sid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cesare's fantasy</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fantasies of Her

No matter the woman with whom Cesare was having sex, it was always the same one in his mind. _Her._ Shockingly young; big blue eyes; long, cascading blonde hair; plump, rounded curves; ample breasts with suckable, prominent sandy pink nipples; full, velvety, voluptuous lips; smooth ivory arms and legs that wrap around him. And a virgin. Each time. Every time. Again and over again. Uncharted, untouched, untainted, and just waiting for him to claim _her_.

Once, during sex with some unmemorable pussy in a long line of unmemorable pussies, he had said _her_ name, aloud. He now disciplined himself to remain silent. Dead silent.

“Didn’t you like it?” his dismayed partner du jour would sometimes ask, and he would reply, noncommittally, that it had been fine. He himself wasn’t much of a lover, he knew. He didn’t put a hell of a lot of effort into gratifying a woman who meant nothing to him beyond being a vehicle for his fantasies about _her_. His fine face and body ensured him a ready supply of eager young ladies available for his use. His use. He snorted a laugh. _His use._ For that was exactly what he did. Use and discard.

His first sexual experience had occurred four years ago, when he was sixteen. The girl was pretty and very willing, a year older than he, and definitely more experienced. In her bedroom, with the door locked and her parents out for the night, he had stood between her thighs while she sat on the side of her bed and pushed down his boxer briefs and opened her obliging lips. He had caught his breath, gripped her slim shoulders and let his head fall back, awash with sensation.   When he tilted his head forward again to look down and enjoy the sight of her, he was jolted through as if by an electric shock, for his considerate friend had morphed into _her_. Blonde hair; voluptuous lips circling his cock; small, ivory hand resting on his panting belly. _Her._ Forbidden. Unthinkable. _Her._ Desperately desired. Twelve years old. A virgin. _Her._

He had come like a tidal wave, astounding both himself and the girl.

He was horrified. What the hell was wrong with him? _Her?_ Of all people to fantasize, _her_?

That, he told himself, had to have been an aberration, the product of his nerves and inexperience seeking something familiar for reassurance. It would never happen again.

But no.

From then on, no matter the charm or allure of the woman, he bedded _her_. Only _her_.

Mercifully for his conscience, she had matured during those years, and his fantasies had matured with her. She was still forbidden. Still unthinkable. But still desired. Still virgin. Still _her_.

 

Cesare sat staring at the plate of pancakes his mother had set before him. He had slept badly and was still groggy this morning, still not ready to get started.

“Cesare, are you all right? Do you feel sick?” his mother asked him, worried.

“I’m okay, Mom. I just had a lousy night. Once I wake up, I’ll be fine.”

She poured him a large mug of strong coffee.

Light, quick footsteps crept up behind him and a small hand tousled his dark hair. Velvety lips pressed his cheek.

“Hi, Mom. OOO, pancakes! Thanks!”

Lucrezia. His sister. _Her._


	2. Drunk And Disorderly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein Cesare does battle with his conscience

Cesare was very, very drunk.

On a Friday night, hanging out with a group of his friends, male and female, he had thrown discretion to the winds and downed beer after beer after beer, becoming staggeringly, helplessly shitfaced. Suzanne Murphy, one of the girls from the group, offered to drive him home and he infuriated her by having to stop twice to puke on the side of the road and then being too drunk to fuck her. She dumped him at his front door and drove off in a huff of exhaust fumes.

Cesare let himself in, as quietly as he could manage in his clumsy, drunken state. It didn’t really much matter anyway. Dad was out of town, supposedly on business, and it followed as surely as night followed day that Mom would have taken one of her sleeping pills and be zonked until sometime mid-morning tomorrow.

That just left _her_.

Dear, darling, delectable, desirable _her_.

Surmising he would come home wasted, when she went to bed, she had left a light on for him in the foyer in an effort to prevent him from tripping and hurting himself. He took the stairs on hands and knees, not even trying to remain vertical. In the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and gargled with mouthwash to get rid of the taste of barf in his mouth, then bounced against the wall as he staggered to his bedroom. He stripped to the skin, pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms and lay down on his bed. The room began to spin, and his thoughts whirled similarly.

 _Her_.

Dear, darling, delectable, desirable _her_.

Just down the hall from him.

Sweet, beautiful, affectionate, considerate Lucrezia.

The object of every secret, sick, splendid sexual fantasy he had ever had.

Lucrezia. _Her_.

She was so innocent. So loving. So pure. So virgin.

What a sick bastard he was! Every woman he had ever fucked had been _her_. The only woman he would ever truly want was _her_. Whenever she hugged him with sisterly affection, he got a boner from feeling her full, soft breasts press against his chest. Her gentle, affectionate kisses on the cheek caused him dreams that culminated in his waking up to stained sheets and sticky thighs.

God, how he wanted to fuck her! _Her_.

He was cursed. Doomed. No one must ever know his lurid desires. She was completely forbidden to him.

Yet there she was, just down the hall. Behind a flimsy door that he could take out with one good kick. He could have his way with her easily. He was a big, strapping six foot two inch, twenty year old, virile, strong man and she was a little sixteen year old wisp of a girl, just five feet tall and barely a hundred pounds. She couldn’t begin to fight him. All he’d have to do… _God!_ What was happening to him? What kind of drunken, depraved monster had he become? He was lying here, entertaining thoughts of _rape_.

Rape!

Taking his baby sister by force.

Laying rough hands on her tiny little body, shoving himself into her, tearing her, hurting her…

He ran like hell to the bathroom and hurled.

Sitting beside the toilet with his knees bent against his chest and his head in his hands, he began to weep. Is this what getting drunk did to him? He was so fucked up. Such a sick, twisted fuck. His desire for her had never lessened, never gone away, had only grown stronger and closer to the surface, that much harder to conceal.

She was so innocent, so affectionate to him. Always hugging and kissing him, sharing her secrets, wanting his company wherever she went. Fussing over him, taking his arm when they walked together, gazing up at him with trust and adoration in her round blue eyes, smiling at him with those perfect, full lips.

And he wanted to deflower her. Drunk fuck her. _Rape_ her.

He must atone. He would go to her and tell how sorry he was. He would go straight to her room and kneel before her and do penance. Yes, that was what he must do.

He went to the sink and washed his face, washed away the tears and the snot, and gargled again.

_‘Liar,’ his conscience snapped at him. ‘You don’t want to apologize to her. Apologize for what? She has no idea of your fucked-up desires. She’ll be asleep. You’re hoping her nightgown will be up around her waist and you’ll see her pussy and then you can go wank off with that image in your mind.’_

“No, honest. I just want to go and kneel at the side of her bed and pledge to never think of her in that way again.”

_‘You’re lying. You want to see her. You want to stand over her and catch the scent of her and be near to her. There’s not one iota of contrition or sorrow in you.’_

“No, honest. There is. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I have to go to her and atone.”

 

He opened her door and slipped into her room, his bare feet making no sound on the carpet. A tiny night light plugged into a wall outlet allowed him to see the outline of her curving hip beneath the blanket. Holding his breath, he approached the bed.

She lay on her side with her back to him. Her hair spread out over her pillow. He caught up a long tress and brought it to his lips.

He must touch her. Her touch would heal him. Like the laying on of hands by saints.

He raised the blanket and slipped into bed beside her.

_‘Sick bastard,’ hissed his conscience. ‘This is what you came for.’_

“No, honest. I just want to be close to her. To feel that I am forgiven.”

For several minutes, he lay beside her, not touching her, his body tense and poised to bolt.

She sighed softly, and the tender sound moved him. He relaxed and laid his head on her pillow. Before he knew it, she had shifted and her body now lay spooned against his, her backside against his crotch. Instinctively, he curled his arm around her.

_‘Happy now?’ his conscience snarled. ‘Isn’t this just what you wanted?’_

“No, honest. I just want…”

_‘This.’_

“Yeah.”

He pressed his pelvis harder to her bottom. She snuggled against his chest, clutching his arm which lay across her body.

Her light, even breathing stopped. He froze in alarm.

She turned over to face him.

“Cesare?”

Her voice was soft, sleepy.

“Yes, Baby. It’s me. Um…I’m…um…I’m drunk and I must have come into your room by mistake. Sorry. I’ll leave now.”

“No, don’t. Stay with me.”

Her arms encircled him, pulling him closer to her, closer to heaven, closer to damnation.

She tucked her blonde head under his chin and pressed her lips to his smooth chest.

“Remember when you used to let me sleep with you if I was scared? I always felt so safe with you.”

_And now here he was, of all the men in the world, the most dangerous for her._

“How drunk are you, Cesare?”

“Pretty damn.”

“Passing-out drunk?”

“Maybe. Probably. I should find my way to my own room so I don’t conk out here.”

“Sleep with me.”

“Oh. Um…I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. Mom would go batshit if she found out.”

“She’ll be out for a long time. We will be up before she is.”

“Well, okay.”

She continued to embrace him. He pressed his cheek to her soft hair and closed his eyes. He was still so drunk that the room spun.

“Cesare?”

“Yes, Baby?”

“Fuck me.”


	3. For Keeps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein a long-cherished fantasy becomes reality

The earth screeched to a halt. The sky fell. He froze into a wide-eyed, open-mouthed statue.

“Cesare, say something.”

“Sis, I must be even drunker than I realize. I thought I heard you say…”

“You did. I did. I said it.”

“You shouldn’t joke about such a thing.”

“I’m not joking. I want you.”

“Baby, I can’t…we can’t…”

“But we must.”

She wound her arms around his neck.

“Isn’t it time? We’ve both wanted to for so long.”

“But…but…Sis…”

“I’ve dreamed of you, of us, together, making love. I know you have too.”

She caught his hand in hers and pressed it to her breast.

“Fuck me, Cesare. Love me.”

He jumped up from her bed and began to back away.

“Baby, I’d better leave before something happens that we both regret. Let’s just forget about this.”

“Cesare, don’t go. Don’t leave me.”

 

_‘Hypocrite,’ his conscience spat at him. ‘As long as it’s you fantasizing about having her, that’s okay. Let her willingly offer herself to you, and what do you do? You fold like a house of cards. Coward!’_

“I didn’t really want to fuck her. It was just the beer talking.”

_‘Liar! Every sexual thought you’ve ever had in your miserable life has been of her. Every woman you ever slept with was her. Now she invites you to fulfill your dream and you turn tail and run. You’re disgusting!’_

“She’s my sister. I can’t have sex with my sister.”

_‘Apparently not unless you think you’d be forcing yourself on her. When you know that she has desires for you, you freak out. You can’t handle a Lucrezia who’s your equal. A grown up, a woman. You have to think of her as an innocent little girl, a victim of your depraved lust.’_

“Not ten minutes ago, you were yelling at me for wanting to fuck her. Now that I say I don’t, you’re giving me hell for that. What am I supposed to do?”

_‘Accept your feelings for her as something good because she returns them. You love each other. You always have. Get over this notion that your wanting her is sick and depraved and therefore can only exist in your mind as depraved fantasies. Go to her. Make her happy. Make yourself happy, you stupid shit!'_

“Really?”

_‘Really. She’s made a choice. She wants you. She’s not lewd or dirty or a whore. She’s a woman who wants a certain man. You’re lucky. Don’t be dumb and piss it away.’_

“Cesare, did I misread your signals? I thought when you got into bed with me that… Have I made a terrible mistake?”

Her lips quivered. She blushed scarlet with shame.

“Oh, Baby, no. It’s just that I’ve had this dream for a very long time, and now I don’t know how to act when it’s starting to come true. I guess I panicked a little.”

“Then we can…?”

“You really want this?”

He returned to her bed.

“I’ve only ever wanted you, Cesare. Why do you think I never dated anyone?”

“I didn’t want to believe it was because of me. It sounded too conceited on my part.”

“I love you. I always have. But I was afraid that if you knew, you would be horrified at me. I felt so alone.”

“I was horrified at myself for the thoughts I had of you. I wanted you so badly. I actually had a fantasy of…well…of raping you…”

_“Cesare!”_

“I thought myself so vile and perverted that the only way I could think of having you was if I forced myself on you. So that you would remain innocent, not a party to my own sick desires.”

An exquisite tear ran down her cheek. He caught it on the tip of his finger and brought it to his lips.

“Don’t cry, honey. We’ll be together now. Yeah, the rules say we can’t be, but there it is. We’re meant for each other. That overrides everything.”

They embraced each other and their lips met in a tender kiss. A kiss between lovers. Her body was soft and yielding as he pulled her closer.

“You really love me, Cesare?”

“Oh, Baby. Now and forever.”

She ran her satiny calf along the length of his leg.

“I used to watch you when you worked in the yard with your shirt off in the summertime. You never caught me looking, thank goodness. Oh, how beautiful you are! I love everything about you.”

“I saw you once. You were coming out of the bathroom with a big towel wrapped around you and the towel fell down. I had just opened my bedroom door to come out and I got a good look at you. I didn’t want to embarrass you so I hurried up and closed my door again. But that glimpse of you haunted my thoughts ever since. God, you were gorgeous! Like Eve in the Garden of Eden.”

He turned over on his back and pulled her up to straddle him. Emboldened by his recollection of her, she slipped off her nightgown. He drew in a sharp breath and reached for her breasts, which amply filled his large hands.

“You’re even more beautiful than I remembered.”

She ran her hands over his chest, gently rubbing his dark nipples. Her eyes locked with his and she bent down to kiss him.

“Are you still very drunk?”

“Sobering up by the minute. Sober enough to make you happy.”

He sat up and embraced her, pulling her blonde head onto his shoulder and stroking her hair. Gently, he turned her over onto her back and began sucking her nipples. He brought his hand between her thighs, opening them to his exploration.

She responded immediately, growing slick and wet. His finger slipped inside her effortlessly.

“You really are ready for me, aren’t you?” he said with a grin.

He traced his index finger, slippery with her juice, over her clitoris, delighting in her moan of surprised pleasure.

 

Question: When had he ever cared so much about making a woman happy?

Answer: Never.

 

He had only ever put forth the minimal effort required to get a woman wet enough to make it easy for him to enter her. But this was something else again. Lucrezia’s passion for him was such that she would make it relatively simple for him, but she was still an inexperienced virgin who should be taken with care and sensitivity. Not his strong suits.

So okay. Go slowly. Kiss her a lot. Whisper to her a lot. Reassure her a lot. Caress her a lot.

She tugged at his pajama bottoms before he realized it, and just that quickly, they were gone. She was proving to be a lot bolder than he expected.

“Oh, Cesare!” She stared at him, her eyes wide with delight.

The touch of her soft hand on his cock nearly made him come. _Jesus!_

Her voice was timid. “Can I…can I…?”

She did.

Her tongue slid over him, warm and wet, circling the tip, making his toes curl.

Was this really _her_ , naked beside him, giving him head? _Her?_

His fantasy. The source of all his feverish dreams. _Her._

She broke away.

“Cesare, is it…am I…am I doing…okay?”

“Oh, honey! You’re great. You’re wonderful. How did you know to…?”

“I read a sex education book. But it’s not the same as actually doing it.”

“Keep going. Please.”

“Do you want to come…this way?”

“No. Not this time. But, Jesus, it feels so good!”

She resumed, her lips curling into a smile around him as her confidence grew.

As she gratified him, he squeezed her breast, groaning at the soft fullness that yielded to his fingers, the hard nipple that pushed against his palm.

“Stop, stop. Stop now, Baby. Let me look at you.”

He sat up and gently lowered her onto her back, pushing her thighs apart to see her pretty little pubic patch, soft and dark and fragrant with her womanliness. Entranced, he gazed down at her pussy, as pink and sweet as a tulip. He stroked his finger down her clitoris and was delighted to see her squirm with enjoyment. He rubbed faster and harder, using two fingers now, and her breathing grew rapid and shallow.

“Cesare, Cesare, Cesare…”

Her back arched and she jammed her hand down over his, pressing hard. Her hips jerked rhythmically, matching his strokes.

Holy shit! He had given her an orgasm. She had loved him enough to relax under his hands and he had loved her enough to tend her properly.

_Fucking A!_

She pulled his body down onto hers and clung to him, murmuring his name. Her legs wrapped around his. He kissed her throat and her shoulders and her lips.

“I love you, Baby.”

She sighed, sounding like an angel, sounding like soft music.

“I love you, Cesare. I’ve never felt anything like that before.”

“It’s what I wanted you to feel. I wanted to make you happy.”

“You did. You do. But I want you inside me now. Come in me.”

“Are you sure? This is for all time. No taking it back when it’s done.”

“I want to. I want you to have my virginity.”

“I want it too. You saved it for me. You must really love me.”

“I do. I always have.”

“Me too. I hope I don’t hurt you.”

“I’m not afraid. I might be if it were anyone but you.”

“Baby…”

His chest constricted. He could not speak. So he kissed her lips and then knelt between her thighs. She reached for his cock and stroked it. A drop of semen appeared on the tip and she spread it around with her fingers.

“Jesus, Baby! You’re gonna make me come.”

“Then don’t wait any longer. Do it now.”

He crouched over her and let her guide him until he felt his cock touch the wet heat of her pussy.

He hesitated.

She raised her hips and pushed herself against him.

Oh, god! Oh, fuck! Oh, shit!

His erection wilted.

“What? What’s wrong, Cesare?”

“I have to go to my room.”

_“Now?”_

“I have to go get protection. I forgot about it.”

“No. You can’t stop.”

“But we have to use protection.”

“No.”

“But you could get…”

“I don’t care. I want you. Now. Don’t you want to?”

“Baby, I have never wanted anything as much as I want you right now. But…”

“Cesare. Cesare.”

She kissed him. Her lips burned against his.

“Fuck me. Fuck me. Now.”

Well, what were the odds?

Beneath him, she was breathing hard, digging her fingers into his back, pushing her belly against his, begging him for it. _Begging_ him for it! _Her!_

His dick throbbed and he plunged into her.

They cried out in unison.

Unencumbered by latex, he relished the exquisite sensations of her slippery, warm vault gripping him, caressing him as he thrust forward and drew back.

He filled her, stretching her delightfully, stroking her insides, teasing her with textures.

He thought about pulling out but before he could, his cock twitched mightily and he flooded her with his semen, ejaculating with the force of a tidal wave.

She gasped, tightening her embrace around him, overjoyed at receiving him, thrilled when he crumpled onto her body, panting and holding her closely.

“Baby…Baby…you’re mine…” he whispered hoarsely.

His dream, his fantasy…lying right there beneath him. _Her._ His. For keeps.


	4. Guilt And Responsibility

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein occurs a near-tragedy

He cradled her in his arms, stroking her hair, kissing her, whispering to her. Reluctantly, he retrieved her nightgown and helped her into it, then pulled on his own pajama bottoms.

Giving up her virginity had been a great pleasure for her. No pain, no blood. Only joy.

Taking her virginity had been overwhelming for him. He felt honored, privileged.

They slept together for a few hours in Lucrezia’s bed, holding each other, snuggling close, but Cesare awoke just before dawn.

“I hate to leave, honey, but I have to for now. Someday soon we’ll be able to be together all the time, I promise.”

He kissed Lucrezia one last time and slipped back to his own room where he fell into an exhausted sleep.

 

“Cesare!”

“Wha…wha?”

“Wake up. Please!”

“Lucrezia? What?”

“It’s Mommy. I’ve called the paramedics.”

“ _What?_ What the hell happened?”

Cesare levitated from his bed.

Lucrezia was crying.

“When she didn't get up, I went in to her room to check on her and she was barely breathing. She apparently drank a lot of vodka with her sleeping pills. I found the empty bottle beside her bed.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ! How long ago did you find her?”

“Just now. I don’t know how long she’s been out of it.”

“Can you go wait at the door? I’ll stay with Mom.”

“Oh, Cesare!”

“Honey, it’ll be okay. Go on now. The paramedics will need you to let them in.”

He pulled on jeans and a t shirt, and then slipped into his mother’s room.

She was sprawled face down on her bed, insensate.

“Jesus Christ, Mom! What the hell did you do?”

He heard voices downstairs, and then rapid footsteps.

 

In his BMW, Cesare drove with Lucrezia behind the ambulance.

“Mom will be okay, Baby.”

“The whole time you and I were fucking our brains out, she could have been dying.”

“Don’t even go there. We had no idea she had downed all that booze along with her sleeping pills.”

“I should have checked on her. I should have.”

“How would you have known? How would either of us have known?”

“If she’s not all right, I’ll never forgive myself. It’s all my fault.”

“Your fault that Mom chose to drown her sorrows with pills and alcohol?”

“I should have paid more attention.”

“Then blame me, not yourself. I occupied you. I distracted you.”

“I persuaded you to stay. I persuaded you to have sex with me.”

“Aw, Baby, don’t do this to yourself! Even if we hadn’t been together in bed, would you honestly have looked in on Mom? No, you wouldn’t have. Look, we will get through this. Like I told you last night, we’re together now. You and me. What happened last night was right. It was good. Don’t let anything make you think otherwise.”

“But Cesare, Mommy…”

“Honey, I’m scared for her too. We will do everything for her that we can. We will be there for her. But she is responsible for her own actions. She did this herself.”

“How can you be so cruel?”

“I don’t mean to be cruel. What’s cruel is you blaming yourself for something that you could neither foresee nor prevent. You mustn’t do that. Your first responsibility is to yourself.”

“Cesare…will you help me? Will you…”

“What, Baby?”

“Will you help me take care of Mommy?”

“Oh, honey. She should be taking care of you.”

 

Rodrigo had cut short his trip and rushed home as fast as he could get there. By the time he arrived at the hospital, Vannozza had been pronounced out of danger and was coming around. Lucrezia sat at her bedside holding her hand.

“You scared us, Mommy,” she said, with gentle rebuke in her voice.

“I’m sorry, darling. I didn’t remember taking my sleeping pills, so I took a few more. It was an accident.”

Cesare bit the inside of his mouth to keep from blurting out that she had obviously forgotten about all the vodka she had consumed as well.

Rodrigo assumed the mantle of concerned, devoted husband so convincingly that only his children were not fooled.

“My dearest,” he intoned in his velvety, rich voice. “I almost lost you. I would have just died. Thank God you are restored to us.”

He kissed Vannozza’s forehead with what looked like genuine emotion.

“Dad,” Cesare said. “I need to talk to you. In private. Outside.”

 

“My sister thinks she’s responsible for this because she didn’t check on Mom. She feels at fault because she didn’t somehow know that Mom was going to wash down sleeping pills with a fifth of vodka. Dad, this whole situation is fucked up. You’re out screwing around and Mom is miserable and drowning her sorrows and a sixteen-year-old girl feels it’s her responsibility to make it right. If you think I’m going to let Lucrezia stay in this mess, think again. I’m taking her the hell out of here, and you and Mom can either get it together or crash and burn. But you’re not pulling Lucrezia and me down with you.”

“How dare you speak to me like that! Your mother nearly died.”

“I’m aware of that. I’m also aware that she’s been a ladylike drunk for years. I know that you have the morals of an alley cat and it breaks Mom’s heart and this is how she copes. I feel bad for her. I really do. If I could help her, I would. But her life is hers to live, and this is what she’s chosen. Lucrezia is still a kid. She should not be feeling like she somehow is supposed to rescue two adults who have made a mess of things for themselves. She’s leaving with me. I truly hope you and Mom can patch things up, but I’m not going to allow Lucrezia to carry you on her conscience anymore.”

“Aren’t you the arrogant little prick! What makes you think she’d just up and leave her parents and go with you?”

“I know she will.”

“I won’t allow it.”

“Try and stop me. I’m not your son for nothing. You know goddam well I will do what I say I will do. Lucrezia is the most important person in my life. She’s not going to suffer any more because you and Mom have fucked your lives up.”

“And where will you go? What will you live on?”

“I have a few irons in the fire. I’m just as resourceful as you are.”

“Your leaving will kill your mother.”

“Your fucking around nearly killed her. Start looking to your own behavior before you preach to me.”

“Why this sudden need to get you and your sister off by yourselves? There’s something about this that just doesn’t seem right.”

“There’s something about a young girl living with a closet drunk of a mother and a philandering father that doesn’t seem right.”

“How dare you judge us! We are your parents.”

“Yet your little girl acts like the responsible adult in the family.”

“You’ve got a lot to learn, boy!”

“I learned from the master, Father Dearest. Lucrezia and I will be fine. I hope the same for you and Mom.”

 

_“Mick. It’s me. I need a favor. I need to borrow your spare bedroom for a while. Yeah, I know what time it is. I wouldn’t be calling you if it weren’t important. C’mon, man. I don’t know…a couple of days, maybe. Maybe longer. What does it matter what I need it for? Okay, okay, it’s a girl. No, you don’t know her. Micheletto, I’m begging you. No, I can’t go to my house. If I could, I wouldn’t be asking you. Aw, hey, man, thanks. I owe you one. And, Mick? If you could change the sheets…Look, I’ll give you twenty bucks if you do. Cool. In about an hour. Just leave the key under the mat. Do not be awake when I arrive. No, I’m telling you, you don’t know her. Don’t be awake. DO NOT be awake. Hey, thanks, man. I’ll see you in the morning.”_

“Pack some things, Baby. We’re getting out of here for a while.”

“Where are we going?”

“To stay with a friend of mine for a bit until we can make other arrangements.”

“But, Mommy…”

“She’s out of the woods now, honey. She’s going home tomorrow. Dad can look after her.”

“But he won’t, Cesare. You know that.”

“You’re sixteen years old. You should be worrying about history exams and prom dresses. Not about taking care of your drunk mother.”

“But she can’t take care of herself.”

“And you can’t either. You can’t make her stop drinking and taking pills if she doesn’t want to. She won’t even admit what she did. How can you deal with that denial?”

“But, Cesare, she’s our mother.”

“And you are the love of my life. I can’t stand the thought of you being dragged down because you feel responsible for Mom and Dad. They’re a mess. A mess of their own making. We can’t save them. We can save ourselves.”

Lucrezia began to cry.

“I can walk out on Dad. But not on Mommy. I can’t leave her. I just can’t.”

“What are you going to do? Devote every minute of your life to her? When you’re at school, be frantic that maybe she’s at home drinking herself into a stupor? Hover over her when you’re at home because you think you can keep her from getting blitzed? Try to force her to stay sober? Demand that she stay sober? For love of you?”

“Cesare, what can I do? She needs me.”

“Oh, she loves for you to believe that. So does Dad. Right now, all she needs is her vodka and her pills. And Dad needs his women. You and I are only a tiny part of their equation. But you’re everything to me. You’re all I care about. Come with me. We can be happy together. I’m not saying abandon our parents. But accept our limitations.”

Cesare put his arm around Lucrezia.

“How about this? We call Mom and tell her that we’re leaving together, but if she needs us, we will be there for her. She only needs to ask. We leave the door open. I’ll bring you to see her whenever you want. But, Baby, for your own sake, let go of this sense of duty you have to our parents.”

“But what about you, Cesare? What about your drinking? That scares me too.”

“You’re right. You’re right to be scared. I’m done with it. I don’t need it. I don’t want it. I do need you. I do want you. Now, honey, please. Pack some things and let’s get going. If you’re still on the fence in a day or two, we will come back. I promise. But give _us_ a chance. Please.”

 

True to his word, Mick had left a house key under the doormat, and had put clean, crisp sheets on the bed in his spare room. After they had washed up, they settled into bed. Lucrezia snuggled against Cesare, pressing kisses to his bare chest and rubbing his nipples.

“Honey, I thought you’d be too upset for that sort of thing,” he said, bemused by her.

“Oh, no. It would comfort me. Make me feel closer to you. But maybe you’re not in the mood.”

“Oh, Baby! Yes I am.”


	5. Philadelphia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein parameters are laid out

Cesare was in the kitchen making coffee when Mick joined him the next morning.

“I didn’t expect you to be awake this early, Chez. You must have had one hell of a night.”

“Oh? How so?”

“Christ, from the noises I heard, you gave it to her real good.”

“Micheletto, if you weren’t my closest friend, I would be kicking your ass all over the street right now. Where do you get off eavesdropping on me?”

“I didn’t try to, but I couldn’t help it. She was _loud_!”

“Well, goddamit, Mick, Just shut up about it.”

“Since when are you so discreet about a woman? You really like this one?”

“Yeah. She’s…well, I’m in love with her.”

“Oh my god! The king is dead!”

“Shut up!”

“May I meet this phenomenon?”

“You may not. And I’ll thank you to make yourself scarce when I leave with her.”

“Look, Chez, I don’t want to get into your business, but this is my house. I’ll accommodate you as best I can, but…”

“I’m sorry, Bro. I’m being an ass. It’s just that I really, really need to keep this a secret. Even from you.”

“Why? I’m your friend, ain’t I?”

“Yeah, of course. But, well…”

“Is this chick married?”

“No. But...well, she’s somebody I shouldn’t be with.”

Mick shrugged his shoulders and snorted a laugh.

“Jesus Christ, Chez! Who is she? A nun? Your sister?”

Cesare’s mouth opened, but no sound emerged. The blood drained from Mick’s face.

“Are you shitting me? Lucrezia? You’re sleeping with Lucrezia?”

“Mick…don’t say another word…”

“Lucrezia? That was Lucrezia making all those noises? You fucked your own sister in my house?”

“Yeah, goddam it! I did. I love her. She loves me. We fucked.”

“Son of a bitch! I can’t believe it.”

“Believe it. We love each other. We always have. We’ve only just now been able to accept our feelings for each other, but there has never been anyone else for either of us.”

“What about all those women you…”

“Meant nothing. None of them. I only ever truly wanted Lucrezia. So now you know. Are you gonna keep your mouth shut?”

“Sure I will. I’m your friend.”

“And Lucrezia? You’ll behave yourself, treat her with respect?”

“I admit I’m shocked, but if your sister is the one for you, who am I to say yes, no or maybe? She’s welcome here the same as you are.”

“Then I am going to tell her to come out of the bedroom and have breakfast with us. It’s a lot easier this way anyhow. Thanks, Mick.”

If Lucrezia felt awkward around Mick, she hid it well, hugging him and accepting his kiss on her cheek, expressing her gratitude for his hospitality. She fixed them all dishes of oatmeal and glasses of juice, and Cesare poured cups of coffee.

When Lucrezia went to shower, Cesare told Mick about his plans to get Lucrezia and himself away from their toxic parental home.

“You could consider moving to Philadelphia,” Mick suggested.

“Philadelphia?”

“Yeah. ‘City of Brotherly Love.’”

Cesare smacked Mick on the back of his head and called him an asshole.

 

Vannozza was weeping as she spoke to Cesare on the phone.

“You’ve abandoned me. You’ve taken away my little girl. How could you?”

“Because your little girl found you half-dead from pills and booze and blamed herself.”

“I told you. That was a little accident. I took a sleeping pill and it made me woozy and I forgot I took it, so I swallowed another. Just an accident.”

“That doesn’t explain the empty vodka bottle in your room or the amount of your blood alcohol that the hospital test showed. Mom, I know you drink. I think I know why you drink. I feel for you. I really do. But I am keeping Lucrezia away from you and Dad unless things improve and you get help. For your own sake, you need it.”

“Lucrezia is a minor. You have no right to keep her from her parents.”

“You and Dad are a piss-poor couple of parents, Mom. She felt responsible to rescue you. A little girl felt she was supposed to take care of a pair of adults. That’s not right. I’d like nothing better than to bring her home, and to come home myself. But not under the present circumstances.”

“I’ll call the police. They’ll bring her home.”

“They’d take one look at you and turn around and leave. I can tell from your voice that you’re drunk right now.”

“You’re so harsh. How dare you sit in judgment of me! You have no idea what my life is like.”

“True. So tell someone who can help you figure things out. A doctor. A counselor.”

“I don’t need help. I need you and your sister to come home.”

“Not gonna happen while you’re drinking.”

“You blame it all on me. What about your father?”

“Mom, I know he makes you miserable. I don’t know why you put up with him.”

“I have nowhere to go.”

“Sober up. Get help. Lucrezia and I will be there for you all the way. But things have to change. Mom, we love you. We want to be together with you. But don’t you see how wrong it is to expect Lucrezia to stay in that atmosphere?”

“I take good care of her. She has a lovely home and beautiful clothes and everything a young girl could want.”

“What young girl wants to have to clean up her mother’s vomit and call the paramedics when she overdoses?”

“She’s never had to do any such thing!”

“Mom, I love you. I want to help you get sober. But until you’re ready, this conversation is over. Goodbye.”

“Cesare, don’t hang up! Don’t…”

 

Cesare wiped his hand over his face and blew out a long breath. How could he have spoken so to the woman who gave birth to him? How could he be so cold to the mother who had rocked and cuddled him, had fed him and comforted him and loved him as a child and doted on him as a teenager? How could he turn his back on her?

Lucrezia entered their bedroom, her face relaxed and smiling, and hugged him.

_That’s how._


	6. Dee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein Cesare meets a friend of his mother's

From the readiness with which Lucrezia acceded to his request that she not speak to their mother, Cesare got the impression that she was relieved to let go of her worries about Vannozza. She got a part-time job at a fast food restaurant after school and on weekends and, at night, slept soundly and peacefully in Cesare’s arms. She began taking birth control pills, relishing the earthy and voluptuous sensations of receiving her lover without a barrier between them.

Mick invited them to stay on in his guest room in exchange for help with chores and paying the utility bills, and got Cesare a job at the construction site where he worked. Cesare’s junior year at college would have to wait for now, but he told himself he didn’t mind that much. Not cancelled, just postponed.

 

Cesare’s ears pricked up when he heard Lucrezia answer her cell phone by saying “Hello, Daddy.” He tried to appear casual and disinterested, but he keyed in on her every word.

 

_“No, Daddy. I’m fine. I’ve never been happier. Of course I miss you and Mommy, but I don’t miss the drama. I’m actually feeling like a teenager for the first time in my life. No, I can’t tell you where we are. No, I can’t come to see you. Cesare wouldn’t like it. Yes, I listen to him. If you want to put it that way, then, yes, I obey him. He takes care of me. I trust him. Because he’s my brother. He treats me like I’m a teenager, and, you know what? It feels good. I have never been able to concentrate on things that teenagers are supposed to concentrate on. Like school. That sort of thing. No, I’m not dating anyone. I’m not interested in anyone in particular. I have boy friends and girl friends. Dad, I’m happy. I hope you and Mommy are able to patch things up between you. No, I am not judging you. I am just stepping away from what should be your concerns. Yes, Cesare told me to do that. But he’s right. I can’t fix things for you and it was hurting me to try. Daddy, I love you. But I don’t like some of the things that you do. You make Mommy unhappy. How? By having affairs, Daddy. You think I don’t know that? I’m not dumb. Cesare isn’t dumb. I’m not saying you don’t love me. I’m saying that I can’t live the life I had been living with you and Mommy. So go ahead, disinherit us. We don’t want anything from you. We hope you can fix things up between the two of you. We hope for it. We don’t demand it. Extortion? Really, you’re calling it extortion? Daddy I love you. But I have to love myself too. Enough to let go of you. Goodbye, Daddy.”_

Cesare saw Lucrezia’s lip quiver as tears gathered in her eyes. He went to her and sat her on his lap.

“I know how hard that was for you. I felt the same way when I talked to Mom. You did great. I’m proud of you. You stood up for your right to have your own life.”

“I couldn’t have done it without our being together. I want my own life, but you have to be in it.”

“I’m here, Baby. I’m with you. I need you just as much. If it weren’t for you, I’d still be living in the squirrel cage. We got each other out.”

“I love you, Cesare. I know I’m just a kid, but I know I’ll love you forever.”

“I love you too. Someday we can put all of this behind us and live the kind of life we want.”

“I’m happy right now.”

“Don’t you have any dreams, Baby? Don’t you hope for anything?”

“Up until now, all I ever hoped for was that I could keep Mom from drinking and Dad from cheating on her. And that somehow, you could love me. Now, I want a life with you. I want you to finish school and follow your dreams and take me with you. When you told me you loved me, my dream came true.”

Cesare kissed Lucrezia’s smooth forehead.

“I’m overwhelmed that you love me that much. But you deserve your own dreams. Maybe in time, when you’ve been away from alcohol and pills and misery long enough, you can start thinking about yourself and your own desires. And I’ll be there for you, just as you’re there for me.”

 

Cesare’s phone buzzed, rousing him out of a deep slumber. He reached for it, knocking it off of the nightstand and onto the floor. Lucrezia, awakening, heard him curse as he fumbled for it.

“Hello.” His voice was thick and raspy from sleep. “Yeah, this is Cesare. Dad? What? How is she? Okay. We’ll be right there.”

“Cesare, what is it?”

“Honey, we have to get dressed and go to the hospital now. Mom overdosed.”

 

Rodrigo shook with fury.

“Are you two happy now? She tried to kill herself. She’s in a coma.”

Lucrezia began to sob hysterically.

“What did she take, Dad?” Cesare’s voice shook so slightly that only Mick could hear it.

“Sleeping pills, of course. The entire bottle. She had just picked up a new prescription. And alcohol. A fifth of 150 proof vodka.”

“Jesus Christ! When did she do this?”

“How should I know? I was out for the evening. On business. I came home at around 2:00 AM and found her and called the paramedics right away. I figured I should call you just on the chance that you might give a shit.”

“Cesare, this is our fault,” Lucrezia wailed. “We never should have left her.”

“Mick. Please take Lucrezia to the waiting room. My father and I need to talk. Go on now, Baby. Go with Mick.”

Mick put his arm around Lucrezia’s tiny, sobbing frame and led her away. Cesare turned to his father.

“Don’t you ever spout your bullshit to her again. You want to play dirty, play me. She’s blameless. And this is precisely the crap I wanted to get her away from.”

“You and Lucrezia abandoned your mother. You broke her heart. Took away her will to live.”

Cesare shook his head.

“Believe what you want. Say whatever you want to me. But tread lightly around Lucrezia.”

“How could you send her off with that hooligan friend of yours? How do you know what he’ll be trying with her?”

“Don’t judge everyone by your own behavior. I’m going to talk to the doctor. But I’m warning you. You have something to say, say it to me.”

 

Mick and Lucrezia sat next to each other in hard, uncomfortable waiting room chairs. They both jumped up when Cesare entered.

“Did you talk to the doctor, Cesare?”

“Yeah, Sis. Mom had a lot of pills and a lot of booze, and she apparently was there for some time before Dad found her.”

Lucrezia began to whimper.

“Honey, don’t…”

“I told you Daddy wouldn’t take care of her. I just knew it.”

“Let’s not lay blame right now, but concentrate on Mom. The doctor says she’s in real trouble. We have to be prepared.”

“Aw, hey, Chez, I’m really sorry.”

“Thanks, Mick. Appreciate your being here. There isn’t much to do but wait.”

 

Rodrigo prowled the corridor. Lucrezia cried quietly against Cesare’s shoulder. Mick studied the floor. When the doctor emerged from the Intensive Care Unit, his face was grim.

“Mr. Borgia. Would you and your family please come with me?”

Lucrezia emitted a panicked squeak. Cesare gently got her to her feet and turned his face to his friend.

“You too, Mick. Please. I need you there.”

 

Within a windowless consultation room, the doctor spelled it out.

“I am sorry to have to tell you this, but Mrs. Borgia is brain dead.”

Lucrezia screamed, “NO!”

“I’m sorry. We did all we could.”

“But Doctor,” Lucrezia pleaded. “She could recover, couldn’t she? She could be all right?”

“There is almost no chance of that, Miss Borgia.”

Rodrigo slumped into a chair.

“What now?”

“Well, she’s on a ventilator, which is breathing for her.”

“She’s breathing, Doctor. You said she’s breathing. So she’s still alive!”

“Miss Borgia, I said a machine is breathing for her. She can’t breathe on her own. I’m afraid you all must make a decision about how you want to continue Mrs. Borgia’s care.”

“You’re asking us to pull the plug? Pull the plug on my mother? No! No!”

“Doctor,” Rodrigo said, his voice flat, stunned. “Is there really no hope?”

“Mr. Borgia, I want to tell you the truth. Although you may have seen movies or read books of people miraculously coming back from apparent brain death, it has never happened in my experience. I know this is hard to hear. But she is no longer capable of those things which we consider to be living. She cannot breathe on her own. She cannot hear or see or even swallow her own saliva.”

“Were the ventilator to be disconnected, how long would she…”

“Not long. A few minutes at most.”

“Would she suffer?” Rodrigo began to weep.

“Mr. Borgia. I am terribly sorry. This is a hellish thing for you and your loved ones. But be assured that your wife is in no pain. She feels no anxiety. We are monitoring her closely and she has shown absolutely no higher brain function almost since she was admitted.”

“Daddy, you aren’t thinking of turning off her ventilator, are you? It would kill her.”

Rodrigo jumped to his feet.

“What do you care, you ungrateful bitch? You already killed her! You and your goddam brother!”

Lucrezia fainted.

Cesare swung his fist square into Rodrigo’s face, knocking him back into the chair.

“You lousy bastard! You motherfucker!”

Mick attempted to separate the two Borgia men while the doctor knelt over Lucrezia, trying to revive her.

Rodrigo struggled to his feet and stood toe to toe with Cesare.

“You killed her. You broke her heart. She was fine until you and her daughter abandoned her. She just gave up after that. Now look what’s happened! Your fault!”

“Mr. Borgia,” the doctor intervened. “Placing blame is not appropriate now. Mrs. Borgia’s welfare must come before any other consideration. Please, for her sake, all of you, try to come to an agreement.”

“My children are responsible for her present condition. Let them pull the plug on their mother.”

Rodrigo stalked out of the room and vanished.

Cesare stood with his hands hanging limply at his side. Lucrezia had started to come around.

“Mick, would you take Lucrezia to the hospital chapel? Honey, we all need your prayers now. Please. Go with Mick.”

When Cesare was alone with the doctor, he spoke softly.

“I’d like to see my mother for a few minutes.”

“Of course. I’ll take you to her.”

 

The instruments provided a garish light in the room where Vannozza lay, a nasogastric tube in her nostril and a tracheal line over her mouth. The fine planes of her beautiful face were hidden beneath the technology which was sustaining her.

“Mom,” Cesare said gently. “Can you hear me?”

He came closer to her side. Her skin was warm and her chest rose and fell with respiration. Surely she was alive!

“Mom.”

He began to cry.

A female voice behind him caused him to jump and try to brush the tears from his face.

“You’re her son, aren’t you? Cesare, I think your name is.”

“Yes. Who are you?”

“Oh, I’m her nurse, Dee. I took care of her once before, when she was admitted a short while back. We got to know each other a little bit then. Such a lovely lady.”

“Yeah. Things aren’t looking too good right now, are they?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“My father has left it to me to decide to pull the plug on her.”

“Oh, wow. That’s a heavy burden. What does your heart tell you?”

“That I hold my mother’s life in my hand. That if I pull the plug, I will wonder for the rest of my life whether if I had waited one more day or one more hour or one more minute, she would have revived and come back. Realistically, I know she’s gone and I need to let her go in peace. But my sister couldn’t bear the thought. She’ll never forgive me if I let Mom go. So I’ll lose both my mom and my sister.”

“Your mom and I had a nice talk when she was here before, and she told me about you. She said you’re so serious. You carry too great a weight on your young shoulders. She loves you very much.”

He snorted.

“Love. Ha. She’s where she is because I decided, like a smart ass, that I was going to go all “tough love” on her. I moved myself and my sister out of the house. I hoped to shock her into sobering up. She begged me to come back and I wouldn’t. I drove her to kill herself.”

“What you said contained a lot of “I”s. What about your mother’s own free will? Isn’t she responsible for her own actions?”

“I said that to my sister to convince her to move out with me, and I realize now how arrogant I sounded. Forgive me. I don’t mean to be rude, but my mother is hanging between life and death and somehow all the clichés and platitudes just seem so inadequate.”

“How old are you, Cesare?”

“Twenty.”

“So young. Much too young to have to make such a decision.”

“Alexander the Great was twenty when he set out to conquer the world.”

“Ah, but the world was much smaller in Alexander’s time. I don’t think it was as heavy a burden as the one you carry.”

“He was quite a mama’s boy, too, I heard.”

“So you’re a mama’s boy? You think so?”

“Truthfully, yeah. I knew she was miserable. I knew she was drinking. I didn’t know what the hell to do. I thought it best to get my sister out of there. Away from our parents. She felt like she should be rescuing Mom. A sixteen year old mothering her own mother. So I got her to leave with me.”

“Do you believe that’s what brought this on with your mother?”

“Hell, yeah! She felt like we abandoned her. Her kids walked out on her when she needed us most.”

“What do you think you should have done?”

“Stayed with her. Supported her.”

“Would that have sobered her up? Made her happy?”

“You know, you’re saying to me the same things I said to my sister.”

“Well, I’d say you’re a pretty smart guy and you should listen to your own advice.”

He chuckled.

Dee continued.

“Life is hard. Too hard for some people. Your mother was one of them. It was only a matter of time. She was having a love affair with death nearly all her life.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I am Death. I had come for her the last time, but because of you and your sister, I gave her another chance. I shouldn’t have.”

“Who are you anyway, you sick bastard? Your prank is not the least bit funny.”

“I’m not trying to being funny. I’ve come for your mother and I want you to let yourself off the hook before I take her. You and your sister are good kids. You’re good together. You really love each other.”

“How do you know…?”

“I _know_. I really am Death. Don’t worry. I won’t be coming for either of you for a very long time.”

“Can you wait until I get my sister?”

“No, Cesare. She shouldn’t be here. This is something for you and me alone. You’re a good guy, so I’m gonna do you a good deed. I’m gonna quietly take your mom now. You’re not gonna have to pull the plug on her and carry her on your conscience for the rest of your life. You’ll be able to look your sister in the eye and tell her that your mom just slipped away easy. Go on and tell her goodbye now.”

Cesare fell to his knees, sobbing.

“Do you have to take her?”

“Yeah, I do. I’m sorry. But she’ll be happy. I promise you. Come on, now. She needs you to let her go.”

Dee helped Cesare to his feet and led him to Vannozza’s bedside.

He touched her hand. Tears streamed down his face.

“I love you, Mom. I’m sorry you were so unhappy.”

Dee laid her hand on Cesare’s shoulder.

“Cesare, don’t do that to yourself. Remember that she loved you and that you brought her joy. So did Lucrezia. Tell your sister that. Remember her with affection. Remember the good. Keep her in your hearts. She knew that you loved her.”

“She did?”

“Every day. Be at peace with yourselves, you and Lucrezia. Love each other. Love life.”

Cesare bent and kissed his mother’s forehead. He straightened and turned around, but Dee was gone. A loud alarm pierced the subdued quiet. He heard running footsteps.

“Code Blue!”


	7. Oh, Father

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein our tale comes to a conclusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With admiring recognition to Madonna, who wrote a song which the author has carried like both an albatross and a prayer shawl.

Vannozza’s funeral occurred on the kind of day she would have loved –mild, sunny, filled with the chirps of the birds she used to enjoy attracting to the feeder hanging in her yard.

Rodrigo wept showily in church during the service. Cesare and Lucrezia sat in the pew with him, just far enough away from him to distance themselves without being too obvious to onlookers. Many were moved by their affectionate support for one another, Lucrezia resting her head on her brother’s shoulder and Cesare leaning his cheek against her soft hair. He had insisted that Mick sit beside him.

“I need you, Bro,” was all he said. All he needed to say.

He had told his sister that their mother had gone easily. She had just slipped away in spite of the life support machines.

“Sis, she had just had enough, I think.”

“But why? Didn’t she know how much we loved her?”

“Oh, she knew. And it made her glad. But she wanted to go. She was confident that we would take care of each other. We need to remember her with love. Not with guilt or sadness or anger. She lived. She was alive. We are the proof of that. And we can bring honor to her memory.”

“Does what we do in bed at night honor her?”

“I love you. I’m faithful to you. I feel good about us.”

“I do too, Cesare. I was ashamed of being so happy about something that should cover me with shame.”

“This isn’t some kinky fling. It’s for real. We’ll have enough issues to deal with in living our unconventional life without worrying about ‘shoulds.’’’

“You’re so smart. How do you know all these things?”

“At the hospital, I spoke with someone very old and wise.”

She laughed lightly and hugged him.

 

At the cemetery, Cesare bent and kissed his mother’s coffin.

“I love you, Mom,” he whispered. “You can rest now. Lucrezia and I will take it from here.”

He held his sister’s hand while she made her goodbye, tearful but smiling. She kissed a rose and laid it on the coffin.

“Be at peace now, Mommy.”

Mick touched the casket respectfully.

“You were a classy lady, Mrs. B.”

 

As they turned away from the gravesite, Rodrigo accosted them.

“Now that this is all over, I’m prepared to forgive you. Come back home and we will resume our lives.”

“You mean, as if nothing had ever happened?” Cesare said. “But something did happen. Mom died.”

“Yes, of course. I know that. But now that she’s gone, there is no sense carrying grudges or bad feelings. I forgive you for what you did to her. Come home. She would have wanted that.”

“Really, Dad? How the hell would you know what she wanted?”

“I was her husband. I loved her.”

“You sure had a funny way of showing it.”

“I took care of her. I provided for her. She lacked for nothing. Neither did the two of you.”

“Goodbye, Dad.”

“You can’t leave me. I’ll be all alone. I’m your father. I’ve been good to you. I deserve better than this.”

Cesare and Lucrezia continued to walk toward their car. Mick had gone on ahead, to give them space.

“Lucrezia is still a minor. This isn’t the end of this. I’ll go to court. I’ll cut you off without a cent.”

“You don’t have a goddam thing that we want.”

“You cannot take her from me! You cannot leave me.”

Rodrigo stood, dumbfounded, alone, watching his children walk out of his life.

 

Mick sat in the driver’s seat of the BMW. Cesare and Lucrezia got into the back, where she curled herself against him and he circled his arm about her.

“Cesare, do you think he’ll go to court over me?”

“I doubt it. But so what if he does? We’ll fight back. As far as cutting us off, we’ve been on our own and doing all right. As long as Mick is willing to put up with us…”

“He is,” Mick chimed in.

“Then we will be fine. The Three Musketeers.”

“More like the Three Stooges, Chez.”

Lucrezia giggled. 

“Or The Three Blind Mice."

 

 

_You can't hurt me now_  
 _I got away from you, I never thought I would_  
 _You can't make me cry, you once had the power_  
 _I never felt so good about myself_

_Maybe someday_  
 _When I look back I'll be able to say_  
 _You didn't mean to be cruel_  
 _Somebody hurt you too_

 

 _Madonna_  
"Oh, Father"  


 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my "Beta" half


End file.
